Monday, March 23, 2009

Hiatus

Yes I am aware I haven't been posting for quite a while now.

My apologies to all, especially because I gave you no warning.

I'm still pretty busy, but I should be back in about 3 to 4 days.
With lots of gossip, yes!

Monday, February 23, 2009

Movie Spoilers

In the spirit of the occasion, I thought it'd be fun to post this - it's every Best Picture winner in Oscar history spoiled in one take in under 5 minutes.


Yep, We Always Knew It


Thrilled with my rediscovery of Dickipedia. Can't believe I forgot about the place. And today's dick is none other than...

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

The Librarians

I wrote this a few months ago - it's from my old blog that I deleted almost as soon as I'd begun it, and I figured I'd repost this entry.


What is it with people? How hard is it to do the one thing you're getting paid for?

I mean, seriously. Can I not get a book out of my college library without having to wait for 15 minutes for the incompetent lady at the counter to figure out how to read the bar code on my card? Can't she and the other doofus in there(librarians, I think they call themselves) figure out how to work a computer?

For the love of god, ladies, if you HAVE to type with ONE FINGER, can't you at least learn to do it faster?
You'd think they'd get it in about a week, what with all the students who've been taking out books, but no, I walk in and they manage to take even longer this time.

And then they have the gall to tell me to be careful with the book because it's a new one. Let me be clearer. What Incompetent Lady said was, "Look, it's a new book; don't tear out any pages!"

Bitch, if I wanted to tear out pages I'd stand in the stacks and rip 11 books a minute. Not wait for twenty just to take one out and rip it apart in the privacy of my room.
Bite me, why don’t you? BITE ME.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Double You - Tee - Eff !?!?

You know your life is SAD when the only thing worth blogging about is your hostel warden.
My life is sad.
So, my two lucky readers, you(once again) get to read about…The Horse.

I never did mention that last month, a whole bunch of us went to our college principal(who is also a nun) to discuss all things regarding The Horse.
The principal was understanding and offered a listening ear…but I’m not quite so sure exactly what she told the Horse, because things have been pretty much the same.

Then last night, we discovered that the Horse had only just found out about the meeting, and actually spoke to one of the girls in the hostel saying, “If you think things are going to get better, you’re wrong. I’m just going to be stricter with you people.”
This really annoyed me, because everyone in this hostel is over the age of 18(with the exception of myself), and are all completely capable of taking care of themselves. Heck people are turning 21 and 22 this year - full fledged ADULTS, and yet she sees the need to “be strict” with them.

The “seniors”, who will be leaving the hostel for good come April(having completed their bachelors degree) are entitled to a Farewell, where the juniors will put up a programme etc.
The Horse told said juniors that the seniors “don’t deserve a farewell” and that if they decided to hold one anyway, she won’t be attending.
Well thank the lord, that’s one thing I’m looking forward to.

On a slightly different note, let me take the opportunity to laugh at The Horse’s English.
I know this is quite a rude thing to do, but I really couldn’t be bothered, she annoys me.
So last night she comes into my room, opening the door with a BANG, and nearly smashing the dustbin behind it into smithereens, because, as she claimed, either me or my roommate(let’s call her A) were on the phone. This of course, is forbidden. Boo hoo.
Anyway, neither of us was on the phone, we were just talking to each other(which, of course, is ALSO forbidden, during “study time”). She tried to take our phones away, but we were adamant, insisting that we weren’t using them, after which she finally gave up, but not before telling us that we’re both liars because

"That was not the talk of the normal people! "

You shoulda seen A and I trying not to laugh.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

And the saga continues....

It's funny how every entry I've made so far relates to the Horse, but she seems to be the only thing that really grinds my gears nowadays. Anyway, seeing as how that's only three posts excluding this one, that's not saying very much.
Anyway, what did the Horse do this time?

Well, last night, she was on her rounds at about 10 p.m., and I happened to have been listening to my iPod. She walked into the room.

"Well, well, what is this? Don't you know it's study time from 8 till 10:30? You disobey all the rules of the hostel. Come and see me in my room once I'm done with my rounds."

So apparently I am being made to study, wether I would like to or not, and to top it off, I have to go visit the Holiest of Holies. Fabulous.

Now while I would prefer not to go into the details of her highly infuriating tirade(mainly because it involved quite a few hostelites and related incidents which would require me to do a lot of explaining) the gist of it all saw her tell me that as the youngest girl here, I am also The Most Troublesome and that if I didn't improve within the week, I would be made to leave.

Trust me, I would like nothing more than for me to leave, but it would be too much of a burden to bear, especially for my parents, who, being in a completely different country and having enough on their minds, I do not want to annoy.

What irritates me the most though, is the way she says my name.

Naomi. How hard is it to say that???

You wont even BELIEVE what she calls me, you have to be innately Indian to pronounce it the way she does - Naah-voh-me.

Naah (like the exclaimation "Ahhhh"), Voh (like Van Gogh or mow or low) and Me.

What the fuck people? What the fuck???

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

The Horse must die.

So her royal bitchiness took out all her frustration on me today.
She'd been away since the beginning of Jan(brilliant start to the new year, eh?) due to ulcers or something(yippeeeee), but today was doomsday as the Horse decided to come back to oversee a guest talk being held here by Ian Fariah.
Apparently, attending this talk was COMPULSORY, but I didn't show up because I have my mock exams going on.
The Horse doesn't think this is excuse enough, however.

When I went downstairs for dinner, she was standing there in all her frustrated glory, and had a nice go at me for not being present. She yelled about how such lectures are meant for people like me, who don't even bother showing up in the first place, and how she only has problems with "you Catholic girls" and blah, blah, blah.
I was honestly and truly pissed off at her, but I tried explaining that I have exams going on, and I cannot afford to be attending two hour talks when I have two thousand pages to study. The bitch didn't even listen.

When I (finally) got back to my table, I only managed to hold it in for 5 minutes before I burst into tears. There is only so much I can take, and even though I'm walking around acting all cavalier about my exams, I actually am stressed and I actually do care about my marks and I REALLY did not need a yelling from a sadistic bitch like her.
She says I should pay a 500 buck fine for missing the talk, but I couldn't be arsed to do so. I'd sooner do the hula on national television. It's not really a matter of the money, more so as the principle of the thing - if I have exams, and I have informed people prior to the event that I shan't be attending, I see no reason why I should be penalised.

Oh, and the best bit?
The talk was apparently about Freedom of Choice.
Bite me somebody.